Friday, September 18, 2009

eleven. eleven. something to wish for.

i don't know what i want.

that seems to be a big problem with me. i've never known what i want, really. not in life. i like leaving things to chance. that way, i don't have to make up my mind. but how do you flip a coin at wishtime?

i don't know what to wish for.

part of me wants to wish for someone to hold. part of me wants to wish to be a better person. part of me wants to wish for you, and for everyone else. part of me just wants to know what i want.

i wish i knew what i wanted.

it'd be nice to know something, for once. to be sure of something. to go after it with conviction, and to be happy when i get it. that would be nice.

i wish i knew what to wish for.

i don't want to be so selfish. why should i wish for anything? let's take a look at what i have. forget what i want. what i want doesn't matter. what i wish for doesn't matter. i don't need to wish. i'm pretty happy :] you can have my wish, if you really want it.

i wish you a good morning :] have a hug. it's on me.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

ten. it's funny how you find you enjoy your life when you're happy to be alive.

hahah, HI THERE.

i don't know who you are yet, and i don't know why i've waited so long to say hello. but we've both been here for quite some time, and it's about damn time i introduce myself. my name is christopher [michael] wade porter.... [III]. :D let me tell you a little bit about myself...

i want to know about YOU.

i want to knowwww your favourite food. i want to know what your smile looks like. i want to know your favourite colour. i want to know what makes you smile. i want to know your hopes. i want to know your dreams. i want to know your fears. i want to know how i can make you smile. i want to know what you think that cloud looks like. i want to know so much.

i DON'T want to know what we're going to do tomorrow. let's let that be a surprise. but the world is beautiful, the weather is beautiful, YOU'RE beautiful, and to be honest, even I feel beautiful. life. life is gorgeous. you'd be surprised how much more gorgeous everything is when you're happy with yourself.

give me a call. fuck it, give me a call at three in the morning. i'll come pick you up. we'll watch the sunrise. we'll tell some stories. we'll laugh [maybe a little too loudly]. we'll put the boom-boom into our hearts.

we'll make this something to remember. :]

Monday, September 7, 2009

nine. just when i was beginning to think...

i'm standing on a big open field of i don't know. i'm alone and my arms are wide open. waiting. i don't know what i'm waiting for. i don't know what's out there on its way to me. but i know that i'll greet it with open arms. adventure, maybe. change. movement in a new direction. good times, bad times. life is out there. life is waiting for me. why am i out here waiting? i open my eyes and look around me. nothing in every direction. the last time i could see anything, there were things all around me. why am i so alone? have i waited for too long? things have moved on without me. i'm lost. i don't know how to catch up.

...and then you run up and give me a hug. and suddenly, i have nothing left to wait for.